South Belfast-based writer Garrett Carr lives in the Holyland area, and has had two novels listed as Reads of the Year by both The Times and the Irish Independent. He is currently working on a new book with the help of the Seamus Heaney Centre and the Arts Council, and is also creating a “map” of fictional places in Ulster used in local literature.

I was born and grew up in…Killybegs, Co Donegal

I now live…near Queen's University, South Belfast

I was educated at…Killybegs Vocational School and a College of Art in Dublin

My earliest memory is…my grandfather looking down at me in my cot, then stealing my bottle

When I was a child I wanted to be…a dinosaur

I actually became…dissatisfied

Worst job you've ever had…a plaything for the orangutans in London Zoo (it was a job placement scheme)

Best job you've ever had…so far, writing

The bravest thing I've ever done…took the last biscuit when Martin McGuinness was there and I knew he had his eye on it

The stupidest thing I've ever done…waved the last biscuit in Martin McGuinness's face, laughing

The biggest thing I've yet to do…hug a blue whale

The people who inspired me most are…never on television

The most important thing in the world is…if I have to pick just one thing; water

I'm very bad at…being good

I'm very good at…yawning and scratching

I'm most proud of…averting World War III in a dangerous spy adventure that I can't tell you about

My best friend would say I…still owe him money

I like to relax by…placing all my shoes in neat rows

My favourite saying/quote is…on Bus Eireann buses, when the luggage hold is opening a recording plays; it’s of an old country fella repeating: "Stand clear, luggage doors operating"

The last book I read was…so long it took me months

My favourite movie is…anything with penguins in it. I can't get enough penguins

The actor that would play me in a movie of my life…one of those monkeys in Planet of the Apes. Or James Nesbitt

The song that makes me dance is…‘The Sash My Father Wore’

The song I would have played at my funeral would be…‘Should I Stay or Should I Go’ by The Clash

The best place I've ever been…was a state of mind

The place I have to visit once before I die is…my mother's nursing home

The last person I talked to on the phone was…my mother

The last text message I received…"Garrett!! Don't you hang up on me!!'

If I was a politician I would…go into opposition

If I won the lottery I would…be surprised, I never play it

If I could describe myself in five words they would be…very long compound words

If I could invite five people (living or dead) to a dinner party they would be…Genghis Khan, Adolf Hitler and my mother. The craic we'd have. (To make up the five, Genghis Khan and Hitler could bring dates)

If I could change one thing about South Belfast it would be…we only have about 20,000 miles of fences, gates and railings. We need more fences, gates and railings

My favourite thing about South Belfast is…you can park your car on the pavements with complete impunity